Sunday, April 22, 2012

Bittersweet...and I will inevitably say random stuff as well.

I wonder how a mixture of things in your day could also make a mixture of emotions. I just finished the Hunger Games trilogy (costing my precious Physics study time) and I was pretty disappointed at the ending at first. But then I realized that Suzanne Collins wanted to show what really happens to a victor who almost lost everything to win. The victory simply just not compensates for everything and the next turn of events will be a dramatically non-climactic one. It somehow leaves a slightly heavy feeling in my heart as I try to sort out whether I'm sad that the trilogy is over or I'm worried about Physics or about the lingering impact of the trilogy's end. It's easy to dismiss it being part of hormonal imbalances during menstruation but I'm not well too pleased of leaving myself to the throes of chemical signals.

Another thing was that some of my team mates in the Music Ministry will soon be leaving as they settle in a church much nearer to their homes. Well yes it's very selfish to not let them go as our church is really quite far from their homes and the church they'll be settling in (which is one of our sister churches) just transferred a couple of months ago and they really need a helping hand to put things in order. I remember the same situation in our church almost two years ago and it's such a great blessing that God used them to be a great help to the ministry and to the church as a whole. Surely I will miss them. I really can't say much on a blog even as secluded as it is the details. I'm not a person who cries easily but I really hope that they will feel that I will miss them so dearly.

Somehow, even if my days are quite mundane with me going about my acads, org work, church ministry, household chores and the likes, I really feel that a change is in order. What's weird is that I feel a entropy in order. It's a very weird feeling that as of this moment I can't think of someone who will actually listen to me as I confide this. No, I'm not worried about the supposed change because I have faith that it's not a turn for the worse. I wish that this is not a mischievous ploy of my hormones again and that I'm really thinking through this one (even though it looks like I'm stoned or something as I'm writing this post).